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___ez_e___ Life Tips & Lessons


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___ez_e___ #1 Posted 02 July 2019 - 11:53 AM

    First Sergeant

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Hey guys!

 

I decided to start a thread about life tips and lessons!

 

I’m going to provide you tips to make your life better and easier as well as lessons I’ve learned in life.  

 

Most of this is serious, but of course I don’t take myself that seriously so there will definitely be funny and light hearted stuff.   

 

Whether you choose to read is up to you.  

 

 

TIP - Get bidets!

 

Thats right!   Every bathroom in my home has a bidet.  The sooner you get the bidet, the sooner you will thank me.    Actually your posterior will thank me.   It’s a great investment.   

 

The bidets of today are high tech.  The bidets I own have variable heated seat, water pressure, dryer, deodorizer, and night light.  Plus you can customize it for users.   Mine also has a remote and soft close lid.    

 

I’ve had bidets for about 10 years and I’m never going back.  In fact, I hate using restroom that don’t have them.  If I could, I would have a bidet installed at work.  


Edited by ___ez_e___, 02 July 2019 - 02:35 PM.


RonaldusMaximus_ #2 Posted 02 July 2019 - 12:48 PM

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The  TP lobby (Big TP) has successfully campaigned against this idea for almost a century. I suppose you can order them on Amazon, but you will never find one in Home Depot.  I suppose if I ever get hemorrhoids Ill consider one, But there's something about Cottonell that makes me feel dry and properly cleaned down there.

_Cletus, on 02 July 2019 - 01:55 PM, said:

 

Step 1:  Don't open your mouth in an alley.


_Cletus #3 Posted 02 July 2019 - 02:25 PM

    Voodoo Wizard

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I agree with the bidet.  I've only ever used one once, in France, but it was heavenly.  I don't have any bidet's at home but I do have a waterhose, so.......

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cheesehead247365 #4 Posted 02 July 2019 - 04:10 PM

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what a great post.  +1 

4sfield #5 Posted 02 July 2019 - 06:25 PM

    Space Lord

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  Sprinkling water on my bunghole after squat purging a bologna sandwich is not my idea of heaven. But then, I’ve made due with a handful of leaves and come home from working the field missing a shirt sleeve or sock. I never once sat there thinking, “Damn, if only I had some water, a blow dryer and some powder to clean this s-hole with, I’d never have to go back to the house”. 

 

 


 

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___ez_e___ #6 Posted 02 July 2019 - 06:54 PM

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When I have to wipe I get that “not so fresh feeling”, but with bidet I’m clean as a whistle.   

 

Think about it.  

 

Either smear feces away by wiping (not really clean and sometimes itchy- btw not from personal experience) or wash it a way with water.  

 

We know some of y’all is nasty.     Lol


Edited by ___ez_e___, 02 July 2019 - 06:54 PM.


_Cletus #7 Posted 02 July 2019 - 07:30 PM

    Voodoo Wizard

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View Post___ez_e___, on 02 July 2019 - 12:54 PM, said:

When I have to wipe I get that “not so fresh feeling”, but with bidet I’m clean as a whistle.   

 

Think about it.  

 

Either smear feces away by wiping (not really clean and sometimes itchy- btw not from personal experience) or wash it a way with water.  

 

We know some of y’all is nasty.     Lol

 Option 3:  Use your hands.  Back in my oilfield days I worked with some guys who just used their hands.  It's a cultural thing, I think from parts of the middle east or africa, I don't remember exactly where they were from anymore.  It's been many years so I may have this backward, but they would only use their right hand for anything because they would only wipe with their left.  I worked with a lot of dudes from all over the world and I always tried to respect people's culture and what not, but I would not allow these particular dudes to touch me at all, with either hand.

 

Don't knock a bidet until you've tried it.  It's so much better.


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4sfield #8 Posted 02 July 2019 - 07:44 PM

    Space Lord

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  You bidet guys are soft. No wonder men have less testosterone than they used to, bunch of sissies. You might as well go ahead and do the transition surgery, y’all aren’t far from needing tampons anyway.

 

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___ez_e___ #9 Posted 08 July 2019 - 03:24 PM

    First Sergeant

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TIP - Get a bedjet 

 

What is it?   Automated climate control for when you sleep.   

 

Why do we need it?   Getting proper comfortable uninterrupted rem sleep is important for overall health.

 

It keeps temperature level (hot and cold) and keeps the sweaty bed away.   

 

For the married guys, this may save some of y’all marriages.  

 

Are you tired of wifey freezing while your still hot?    Bedjet is your answer. 

 

I just recently upgraded to the Bedjet 3.  

 

Sleep in peace. 

 


Edited by ___ez_e___, 08 July 2019 - 03:25 PM.





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