WE MADE IT A FREAK'N YEAR! TIME TO CELEBRATE
August 5th marks the one year anniversary of the best clan on Blitz that I've ever been a part of.
To honor the folks that help make it that way, the Tater Council and I have come up with a little contest.
I'm not going to pat anyone on the back right now, I'm just going to get right into it because normally I end up typing a whole bunch and the point I'm trying to make gets lost somewhere in the story. Sort of like the time that RazerNaga and I were running around in our Obj 140s on Port Bay, and after securing the outside edge, we realized most of the Reds had actually gone town, so we had to double back and before we could get there the whole team had pretty much been destroyed except for him and I. I was keeping my distance as opposed to my usual "Run in there and shoot everyone in the Face" style of medium tanking, but I had a feeling I would need my HP for the end of the battle when it was more one on one terms with some lucky Red Tanker. Razer dashed through several tanks, happily shooting them as he went while I was shooting what he had spotted until...
What was I talking about again?
Oh yeah.
The contests. We are going to again break it up into several tiers to give everyone a chance to happily potato their way to a prize. So remember, you can only win one prize. You CANNOT WIN MULTIPLE CATEGORIES. We are going to try and be as inclusive as possible with our selection of goofy requirements, so hopefully everyone gets the chance to try their hand.
If not, I've been told T4four is making one of those pools of water where the little plastic ducks go around, and all you have to do is pick one up and see what color dot is on the bottom. I'm not certain what the prizes are for that, but I believe they range from a lollipop to a free toss of the ball at yours truly as he sits on the dunk tank bench.
First lets go over a few general guidelines:
ALL CONTESTS ARE ONLY OPEN TO SPUD/SPUDX MEMBERS. (Except the Bring a friend to the Potato Patch Contest) If that's not you, sorry, you can't play our tater games.
I RESERVE THE RIGHT TO MAKE ALL FINAL DECISIONS REGARDING PRIZING AS I SEE FIT. Why? I dunno. It's just the way I roll and it's worked out okay for a year now...
NO CHEATING. While I'm not overly worried about this, there's a first time for everything. The Tater Council will discuss and determine the outcome for all cases of cheating. Just do what you think is right, and no one will have a problem with this.
RESULTS MUST BE POSTED IN THIS THREAD IN THE PROPER TIMELINE TO BE ELIGIBLE. It makes it easier for me. I like easy.
ALL RESULTS MUST HAVE THE MAIN BATTLE RESULTS SCREEN WITH THE TIME STAMP REGARDLESS OF WHAT CONTEST YOU ARE ENTERING. It's got the time stamp on it. This rule should be fairly self explanatory. Plus, its the way we've always run our contests. Veterans, help the new guys. New guys, if you need help ask.
Finally let's get on to the specific rules/contests.
Contest 1:
Tier 3 Seal Clubber Contest ~ Requirements ~ Must be driving a tier 3 tank in a platoon with another SPUD/SPUDX clan mate. Highest combined damage wins. Must win the battle.
Prize: You will be able to hold the digital SPUD seal clubbing trophy high above your heads secure in the knowledge that for the next year, no one in our clan can match your seal clubbing prowess. Last years winners will wear prom dresses and present the trophy in the main hall of the club house after sundown on the 5th Friday of this month.
Tier 4 Low Tier Platoon Contest ~ Requirements ~ Must be driving a tier 4 tank in a platoon with another SPUD/SPUDX clan mate. Must be Low Tier. (ie: A tier 4 platoon in a tier 5 game) Highest combined damage wins. Must win the battle.
Prize: Personalized Digital Signature or Avatar made by Yours Truly.
BG's Panzerfest 2016 Tier 5 Low Tier Platoon Contest ~ Requirements ~ Must be driving a tier 5 tank in a platoon with another SPUD/SPUDX clan mate. Must be Low Tier. (ie: a tier 5 platoon in a tier 6 game) Highest combined damage wins. Must win the battle.
Prize: BG Donated 2 $10 iTunes cards to the winners of this contest. So I'm changing the Name of the contest and tossing in a digital trophy as well. To Be Determined. The Council took a week off in the end of July, and we never really got around to voting. You know how it is.
Tier 6 Free For All ~ Requirements ~ Must drive a Tier 6 tank. Highest Damage wins. Only one Winner. That's it.
Prize: 10 dollar iTunes Gift Card. (Unless you're in Canada... Then you may just get ten bucks paypal'd to you, or maybe just some Loonies and Toonies mailed to your address... Why? Because Apple Hates Canada. Talk to them. I'm just trying to make the system work.)
Tier 7 IS-X Clubber Contest ~ Requirements ~ Must drive a tier 7 tank in a platoon with another SPUD/SPUDX clan mate. Must bring me the most IS/IS-3/IS-3D/IS-6 kills as possible. Must win the battle. Whichever platoon kills the most IS series tanks (in one game) that proliferate tiers 7 and 8 like locusts will be granted my eternal gratitude and this fabulous prize:
Prize: 10 dollar iTunes Gift Cards (1 each) and my blessing to put "Certified IS Tank Exterminator" in your Signature. (Which now that I think about it, you don't really need.)
***Tier 8 Random Awesomeness Contest ~ Requirements ~ Bring the Potato Patch something Epic. I don't mean a Mastery in the IS-6. I mean something truly epic that after it's done makes you go "How the... What just... Well that will never happen again." I'm talking a steel wall in an RU. Or ramming all seven Red tanks to death. This one will need to be voted on. And I don't just mean the winner, I mean if it's even applicable. This one is pretty loosey-goosey... but we're gonna try it anyway. Worst case, we don't get a winner, and we'll have to wait until next year.
Prize: Utterly Awesomeness Dependent. I don't know what it will be, but when I see it, I'll know. It's sorta like that.
Blartch Special ~ Requirements ~ Post your screen shot of an Ace Mastery with a Koloanov Medal. If we have multiple entries they will be discussed by the potato council and the winner will be determined via our complicated and rather dilapidated process of burning different colored potatoes to make different color smoke come out of a chimney while listening to bagpipe music until a winner is left amoungst the applicants. It's not a pretty process, but someone said they read it in the official SPUD rule book and I'm too lazy to check and see if they're actually correct. Winner will be picked by Blartch and I. If we need a tie breaker, it'll go to the potato council.
Prize: 10 dollar iTunes Gift Card and a Digital "I Blartched it!" trophy, and a broken 1:35 scale model of a tank with some **barbie doll legs glued onto it somewhere. (Sex Sells.) **[Barbie Doll legs may or may not actually be glued onto it.]
(Side note. I'm going to chuckle if Blartch doesn't win this one. I like to chuckle. Help me out folks.)
Gordon Geckko Contest ~ Requirements ~ Post your screen shot of the most NET Credits gained in a singular battle. Anything goes as far as getting those credits. Missions/OP credit grinding tier 5 premium tanks/Running no provisions and only AP rounds... whatever floats your boat. I want to see what the most money Tater Nation can bring in with a singular game. Show me how well we can work in the new economy!
**Net Credits are the Credits show on the battle results page. It's the first one, with the time stamp... Or basically how much you made after paying for repairs/ammo/etc etc...
Prize: Digital Trophy and a Personalized Digital Signature or Avatar made by Yours Truly... Featuring something about how rich you are. Yachts? Mansions? Gold Plated Tank Statues? All of them may be in your signature. Why? Because you're rich and you should flaunt it over us peasants. It's what the ungodly rich do. Why no iTunes? Because you're rich you don't need more money from me.
Lehman Brothers Trophy ~ Requirements ~ Post your screen shot of the most Credits lost in a singular winning battle. *1Must also be in 1st or 2nd position in team damage to be eligible. Anything goes as far as losing those credits. You want to spam all gold? You want to run overpriced provisions in a tank that makes no credits? Be my guest. Show everyone out there that the Tater Nation can buy stats if we want. We aren't afraid of the new economy.
Prize: Digital Trophy and a 10 dollar iTunes card. I feel bad for you, and I know that gold rounds ain't cheap, so I'm going to enable the winner to keep spamming for just a short period longer.
Bring a friend to the Potato Patch Award***** ~ Requirements ~ Post a screen shot of someone NOT IN SPUD/SPUDX platooning with someone from the Potato Patch. Your Platoon must win the game, and the two of you must be either 1 and 2 in XP or 6 and 7 in damage on the team results screen. (Sometimes we potato.) Each SPUD/SPUDX member may only submit ONE entry for this event. Both parties must post in this thread with a quick description of the game to be qualified. We here at the campfire like stories. It doesn't have to be a literary master piece, but we want to know that the battle was consensual both ways...
Prize: The Non Tater will receive a 10 dollar iTunes card, and the Tater will receive a digital award to be presented by Yours Truly that simply states, "Despite the fact that I'm not very smart, talented, or even attractive, I still have friends."
(I do reserve the right to bounce applicants out of the competition on this one if I feel they are just undeserving of a chance to win. Utterly my discretion, and my discretion alone. If you feel that is unfair... To bad. You have the option to start a contest and run it as you see fit. So do I.)
Contests will run from August 5th 6:00 AM Central time (because that's easy for me to keep track of) and run through *98August 22th at Noon Central time (Because that's easy for me to keep track of).
Questions comments or concerns should be posted here and I will try and answer them to the best of my ability. We should have the tier 5 prize nailed down by the start of the contest... and possibly add in something fun and exciting with tier 8... but we haven't beaten out the details for that yet... I'm not worried we still have some time. (However, this does mean some rules may be changed as we clarify things... keep updated with this thread.)
Oh, also, as a side note, I'm letting everyone participate. Tater Council, King SPUD, whatever. This is a 1 year anniversary, and I want everyone to get the chance to play... No holding back. In the event that someone from the Tater Council needs to be reviewed, or discussed (such as an applicant for the Blartch Special) we will hold special council without them so it's fair. In the event that I'm in the running for something that needs to be discussed or reviewed, well... I win. Why? Because it's good to be King. In the event that I win something, I'll probably give the second place guy a prize of some sort because my surprise face on opening my own iTunes Card is lacking... And I can make my own signatures without winning a contest... So, none of that really appeals to me.
*iTunes cards can be substituted for Google Play cards at the Winner's discretion. Unless you're from Canada, because I have no idea how that works... if you're from Canada and you win one of the contests, we'll talk and figure something out... I know that it's prime Zamboni season up there, and if one of you wins it's because you took special time off from cleaning ice, and that means a lot to me.
Okay, here we go! Good talk everyone.
*Slightly edited with digital trophy prizes and speelingz and grammar mistakes... I think there are still more if I can find them.
**Adjusted the Blartch Challenge officiating procedure because that random potato smoke color thing sucks. Blartch came up with a much better method. We'll be re-writing the rule book as soon as someone fixes the typewriter from when T4four threw it in the pond to see if it would float. I was surprised it did until Humble started shooting it... Oh well. Maybe we'll get a computer if the budget is better next year, but it's just such a pain to get the white out off the monitor screens with those...
** Geckko Winner will be based off Net Credits, not Gross Credits. (ie: Credits after paying for repairs/ammo/etc etc)
***Added tier 8 mission.
****Added prize for tier 5 and renamed contest. Thanks BG!
*****Added the "Bring a friend to the Tater Patch Award."
*1Added a team damage position requirement for the Lehman Bro's contest to keep people from spamming APCR at a rock while their team carries them.
*98 Extended End date of contest from Aug 15th to Aug 22nd.
Edited by ahredstealth, 15 August 2016 - 01:20 PM.